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Healthy Living  •  Health and Wellness  •  Stress Relief

How to Talk to Your Boss About Stress

Melissa Rudy
By Melissa Rudy

For many of us, work takes up the majority of our day. Whether it’s running a checkout counter, leading a team, driving a bus, or caring for patients, our jobs can be rewarding—but they can also bring stress. Pressure to meet deadlines, conflicts with coworkers, heavy workloads, long hours, or a lack of work-life balance can all take a toll on both mental and physical health.

Stress isn’t always negative. In small doses, it can help us stay focused and motivated. However, when stress builds, it can become overwhelming, affecting one's mood, health, and job satisfaction. One of the most effective ways to reduce workplace stress is to communicate with your supervisor or manager, since they often influence workload and work conditions.

Here are practical tips for approaching the conversation:

1. Write Before Speaking

It’s often hard to put feelings into words when stress is high. Writing down your thoughts beforehand can help. Try listing:

  • What you’re feeling

  • What you want

  • What changes might help

This reflection makes it easier to stay calm and clear during the discussion.

2. Start with Gratitude

Begin the conversation by highlighting positives. Expressing appreciation first helps create a supportive atmosphere and makes your manager more open to helping. For example:
“I really enjoy being part of this team, and I’m grateful for the opportunities I’ve been given. At the same time, I’m finding some parts of my workload difficult to manage. Could we discuss ways to adjust this?”

3. Keep It Clear and Concise

Be specific about your concerns and needs without overwhelming your supervisor with too many details. A focused 15–20 minute conversation is usually enough.

Examples:

  • “I’d like to discuss how I can have more input on upcoming projects.”

  • “I’m feeling overwhelmed with my new role and would like support in creating a plan to manage responsibilities.”

4. Choose the Right Time

Timing matters. Avoid approaching your boss during busy or stressful moments. Instead, schedule a formal meeting, just as you would for any other important discussion.

5. Make It Personal

Whenever possible, have the conversation in person. If that isn’t an option, a video or phone call is better than email or text, which can easily be misinterpreted.

6. Bring Solutions, Not Just Problems

Share your concerns, but also offer ideas for solutions. For instance:

  • If you feel overworked, suggest ways to adjust deadlines or delegate tasks.

  • If you enjoy your job but need more balance, ask about flexible scheduling.

7. Stay Open

Your supervisor may have their own ideas for solutions. Even if they aren’t what you expected, take time to think them over. Showing flexibility helps build cooperation and makes it more likely you’ll find common ground.

8. Know Your Limits

Sometimes, even with open communication, workplace stress can remain toxic. If that’s the case, it may be necessary to consider whether a role or environment is right for you. Protecting your mental and physical well-being should always come first.

9. Be Gentle with Yourself

Stress management is a skill that develops over time. Each challenge is an opportunity to learn what works best for you and how to build resilience in future situations.

And most importantly, if stress or anxiety is interfering with your ability to function, reach out to a healthcare provider. Support and treatment are available to help you cope.


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