Happy March, Everyone!
This month I will show you how you can take control of your destiny.
When I was younger, I had “victim mentality” as a result of many life experiences including:
Growing up in a single-parent household
We didn’t have much money, so my mom had to work overtime a good amount
As a result, I was a latchkey kid and took care of myself a fair amount of the time
I had a few different traumatic experiences
I had severe social anxiety that made me “the shyest kid in class” who really would walk down the halls at school looking at the ground because I didn’t want to have to talk to other people
Even with these challenges, I consider that I had a good childhood and know many people had far more difficult challenges than me.
But this victim mentality plus the anxiety held me back from trying many things. I slowly made a good amount of progress in these areas.
The key that accelerated this area for me was reading Man’s Search For Meaning by Viktor Frankl when I was around 24. This book shares the story of how Frankl survived living in a Nazi concentration camp. It also presents his philosophy with a main point that no matter what happens to you, you have the freedom to choose your response. Frankl said:
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
Frankl originally did not want to use his personal story, but he realized his story was the ultimate example of living this philosophy and could inspire others to do the same.
This book made a lasting impression on me. I thought, “if this man can choose his response in a concentration camp, then of course I can also take control of my destiny.”
It’s not a coincidence that after reading this book, I got a big promotion at work and became an entrepreneur by starting a company with a friend (the friend who recommended I read this book). I have carried lessons from this book through many life challenges including surviving a golf ball-sized brain tumor and then building back my health.
Here are 5 ways I believe you can take control of your destiny starting today:
Start practicing Frankl’s lesson: No matter what happens to you, you can choose your response. I do realize some points like major health issues and other life issues can make this extremely challenging.
Small goals: Setting, reaching, and tracking one small goal at a time in all areas of life is an incredible way to build your resilience.
Setbacks: We all have setbacks. The key with a setback is what you choose to do after the setback. Learn from it and prepare to move forward. The simple saying, “one step back and two steps forward” is a good way to look at this. Any time you have a setback, simply learn from the setback and get motivated to take those two steps forward.
Ask for help: We don’t need to face issues alone. Surround yourself with people who will help you in challenging situations as you help them.
Have the courage to be coached: Being open to coaching from others is such a key to life. I still work to take feedback from others as a way to improve just like Frankl coached me through his extraordinary story.
If you haven’t connected with me yet in the community, here is my profile (you need to be logged in). I’d love to connect! Let me know if you have any questions about taking control of your destiny or anything else once we connect.
Have a great month!
Chris “SparkGuy” Downie
PeopleOne Health Co-founder & Motivation Expert
